Updates on Carol
Carol, wife of lead pastor, Jim Garlow has been battling with Cancer since 2007. This amazing blog shows the ups and downs of her continuing struggle with her Cancer. Our prayer is that it will help you to know how to pray more specifically and bless those who may be going through a similar battle
Monday, Jan 18, 2010, 5 pm
posted on 01/18/2010 No comments
Well, it has been months since I have written about Carol’s condition.
Bottom line: she is doing great. We just received a report of her new CA-125 markers. They are 6.5. This is superb. Last time it was 4.9. Anything under 30 is considered good. However, we watch Carol’s markers extra close due to the fact that she only got to an “11” when the cancer recurred last time.
She will have an MRI in mid February and will know results by Feb 22. That is another critical hurdle.
The major challenge: her body requires massive amounts of rest. She seems to be able to function close to normal for two days, but then sleeps nearly the entire day on the third day. Today is an example. She slept till noon today, was up for approximately one hour, then went back to bed and is currently still sound asleep at 5 pm.
This is the only disappointing aspect of her recovery process. We have simply had to adjust to “the new normal.” Candidly, I no right to complain, as I am so glad she is alive and doing so well – considering all she went through. I was hoping, however, that she would have much more strength.
The oncologist is running tests, but he is convinced that this needed sleep is caused by the interplay, the reaction of three of the medicines she is currently using.
Other than the limited physical strength, she really is doing very well. Her original diagnosis was June 20, 2007. The five year mark – that she must break through – is June 20, 2012. Thus on Jan 20, 2010, she will have made it through 31 of the 60 months of a five year walk – with only 29 months to go. 31 DOWN; 29 TO GO! Thus she has cross the halfway point. We are aiming for the finish line!
Thank you for ongoing prayers. We SO VERY MUCH appreciate you and your prayers.
Thursday, Nov 12, 2009, 4 pm
posted on 11/12/2009 No comments
Well, I have not done a good job communicating, have I?
But the news continues to be good. In addition to a great MRI report (next one is in February), we received word that Carol’s CA-125 markers are 4.9. For most people, being under 30 is good. For some reason, Carol’s numbers run a little lower. For her, 5 or 6 or 7 or 8 is very good. A slight raise to 11 was a warning last time. Thus we are elated with a 4.9.
Bottom line: all reports are good! Thank you for your prayers.
Many of you who check on this blog are from other states, but some are local. When you see Carol with a bandage on her hand and wrist, it is because she had minor surgery (totally unrelated to cancer) today on her thumb. She had lost usage of her thumb on her right hand, thus they cut into the tendon sheath today. She will need to be careful for the next few days.
Her regular meds make her quite sleepy much of the time. She still – although it has been several months since she received her 12th and last chemo – needs a great amount of rest, including a lengthy nap or multiple naps a day. The meds she is on make her quite drowsy a lot of the time, including during sermons at church! (With the preaching being so exciting, how is this even possible!)
You laugh, but – as her husband, and as a preacher – it is not very funny to me. I am not the least bit bothered that she sleeps during my sermon. I am concerned however when I see her head going down…down…down…knowing that people behind her are afraid she will fall over. (That has not happened. Yet!)
Now, add to her ongoing meds the fact that they gave her a partial anesthesia today, plus they have started her on pain medication (the drowsy type), I suspect she’ll be asleep for the next week?!?!?! Other than that, she is doing great.
Jake is deep into wrestling. Josie and Jake attend the same culinary arts class at Valhalla High School at the end of each day. Jake loves it, and feels he wants to go into culinary arts, so we are exploring options there.
For those of you that are out of state, Skyline Church is on the verge of a new Worship Center. Check out http://www.skylinechurch.org/timetobuild/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/NowBrochure1Small.pdf
This is so very exciting. We have waited a long time for this building. (Due to massive building complications, followed by horrific litigation challenges, Skyline has not build a worship center for 35 years!) Our new auditorium is now just “around the corner!” We hope to break ground in or before May 2010. I am having more fun pastoring than I ever have! The people of Skyline have REALLY stepped up, taken ownership of lifting the load for this new building – even in a “very down” economy! I so respect the people I serve here!
I have spoken at pastors conferences in Dallas, Washington State and Illinois, and will be at a pastors event in DC next week (www.religiousfreespeechrally.com). Also thrilling to me is the fact that The Garlow Perspective one minute commentary is now on 827 radio outlets daily. If you want to receive an eNewsletter about what is happening with regards to that, and about some authoring / writing I am doing now, just let us know (tburger@skylinechurch.org) and we will include you on the email list.
In addition, I have continued doing interviews, most recently on DayStar Television Network in Dallas-Ft. Worth, and on a local news broadcast on a television station in San Diego – KUSI – regarding our involvement in the vote to save marriage in Maine. See http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=znkecvIm1FI.
It was a joy to see SO MANY OF YOU in Oklahoma! Thank you so very much for praying for Carol. When Carol and I were at the 100th Anniversary Homecoming of Oklahoma Wesleyan University (Bartlesville – north of Tulsa) Oct 9-10 and then at the 100th Anniversary of Bethany First Church of the Nazarene (Bethany – in the greater Oklahoma City area) Oct 24-25, we were overwhelmed with your compassion for Carol and what you shared with us regarding your commitment to pray for her during these past two years. I truly believe that she is alive today because of the prayers of God’s people. I am not undervaluing the medical treatments, but I believe their efficacy is tied to your prayers. I am so, so grateful!
Being at those two Oklahoma events felt quite literally like a “touch of heaven on earth!” It meant more to Carol and me than we could put into words. We left overwhelmed, thanking the Lord for “the family of God!”
Sure love you all!
Jim
Monday, Nov 2, 2009, 10pm
posted on 11/03/2009 No comments
Carol’s MRI was today. Report: Everything is normal!
Praise God!
More details to follow – but wanted you to know this great news!
Thursday, Sept 3, 2009, 2 pm
posted on 09/03/2009 No comments
We have been enjoying this sabbatical. The beach condo has been great.
An update re: Carol. A friend graciously provided two professional pilots and a prop-jet and flew Carol and me to Redding, CA to the Healing Rooms at Bethel Church. We have wanted to go for some time, but were so grateful that he made it happen quickly.
We left the ground at 7 am this past Saturday. We were in Redding at 9 am, and at the “Encounter Room” first, then to the “Upper Room” for prayer. We flew out at noon. We touched down at 2 pm.
The person praying over Carol began with the words (referring to the cancer) “overthrown!” After praying for cancer to be forever gone, she began to focus on other health concerns of Carol.
The assigned intercessor – as she works for a neurologist – fully grasped another area Carol needed prayer: her back & disc (unrelated to the cancer).
I will let Carol write up her thoughts and feelings of the day, but it was a special moment for us.
We came to our East County house from the beach condo for one day, but are going back to the beach.
Carol is loving getting into the waves! She cannot get enough. She and Josie prefer boogie boarding. Jake is surfing, almost constantly.
I am using the time to jog & walk on the beach, and ride my bike on the boardwalk.
On Tuesday, I reached a goal. I had been doing a walk (30%) / run (70%) combination. But on Tuesday, I decided to see if I could run the entire 8 miles without any walking or stopping. That is nothing for all you marathoners and half marathoners, but 8 miles is a lot for me.
I am not a runner. I don’t have a runner’s body or runner’s knees either. Running is – to me – hard.
But, I do know how to get my spirit to control my mind which, in turn, controls my body. (For the record, that is biblical, NOT new age. : ) ) So Tuesday was the day.
The last time I have run 8 miles was in Oklahoma City in 1982. It was a beautiful fall Saturday morning. All the other runners were the types that run in races every Saturday. But I decided to try. I came in last! But I finished, and that was my goal.
So it was a thrill – after 27 years – to do it again. Who knows, I may go out and run it again today.
We are savoring the time at the beach, thanking God for His creation. And we are feeling “life restored” during this sabbatical. So grateful for this season.
And – thank you for praying for Carol! We are so grateful.
Thursday, Aug 20, 2009, 8:30 pm
posted on 08/21/2009 No comments
Big News. Not only did Carol finish her chemo today…but we heard that word from the doctor that we thought we would have to wait to hear: REMISSION! Yes! REMISSION! YES! And we just moved into our beach condo (See http://www.vrbo.com/134780). So this is gonna’ be a great time of celebration! (We know that she has to STAY in remission, but we are celebrating this milestone now!) Praise God. Thanks for praying!
YES!!!
A happy Jim
Sunday, Aug 16, 2009, 11 pm
posted on 08/18/2009 No comments
Carol continues to handle the chemo very well. Her last (6th) chemo will be Thurs, Aug 20. We still hope to hear the words ‘in remission” before Oct. 1.
We hope to spend some time at the beach condo. It is almost always rented out, but we plan to spend some time there now. We are so eager to get there. To us, it is a touch of heaven.
When you get a moment, go to http://www.okwu.edu/assets/pdfs/Summer09Tower_lowres.pdf then scroll down to the bottom of page 19. Great article about Carol from last March. Just found it.
Shifting topics: I have been on sabbatical.
What does a pastor do when he has time off? Well for one thing, I went and preached for my son-in-law, Jeremy McGarity, at “Seven Church-San Diego” this morning. Was great being with our kids and their wonderful church family.
As most of you know, most of my sabbatical I have been sorting, throwing away, culling, organizing, etc.
I have taken on one project after another, all of them long overdue. I have successfully tackled many. But I have many yet to do.
My study is considerably cleaner. Eighteen file drawers have been culled & properly organized. The garage has been cleaned, cleared out.
Tens of thousands of photographs have been organized. The attic has now been cleaned out.
Next I will begin transferring many old VHS tapes to hard drives. There is much to be done. My office at the church needs attention badly. My library at the church needs to be organized. Eight file cabinets at the church need culling. But making huge progress.
I am operating on the thesis that “part of the keys to achieving inner peace is to finish all the things one has started, yet never finished.” Thus, working accordingly.
I know all the above does not sound like much fun. And it is not. But don’t feel sorry for me. Why? Because our thoughts are shifting towards the beach. See you on the sand!
And – SUPER thank you for continuing to pray for Carol.
Monday, Aug 10, 2009, 4 pm
posted on 08/10/2009 No comments
Tomorrow – Tuesday, Aug 11 – is Carol’s XXth birthday. Feel free to send a greeting to cgarlow@skylinechurch.org.
Tuesday, Aug 4, 2009, 10 pm
posted on 08/05/2009 No comments
Carol has to take anti-nausea meds so the chemo won’t make her sick. The good news: it works. The bad news: it puts her to sleep.
Thus she takes many naps a day. She falls asleep on a moment’s notice.
We laughed hard yesterday because she fell asleep WHILE TALKING ON THE PHONE to our daughter Janie. Right during the phone conversation! She woke up and realized she had been on the phone and promptly recovered by saying, “Janie, what did you say?”
She falls asleep every time we get in the car to drive somewhere.
She gets up in the morning, then takes a nap. After that, she takes a nap. Then – as you have guessed – when that nap is over, she takes another one.
We were visiting a church last Sunday, as I am “off” during a sabbatical. I looked over at her during the sermon and she was sound asleep. She looked so comfortable, I did not disturb her. She woke up in time for the benediction.
I told her as we were driving out of the parking lot, “you slept through the pastor’s sermon.” Without bating an eye, she looked back at me and said, “Which is exactly what I do every week through yours.” I thought I was supposed to laugh at the joke. It was then that I found out that it was not a joke. My poor wounded preacher-ego!
But the incessant nap-taking is a small price to pay in order not to be sick during the chemo. We are still praising God that the 2009 chemo experience is nothing compared to the horrors of the 2007 chemo experience, complete with many trips to the hospital, the emergency rooms, non-stop vomiting, and indescribable discomfort. The 2009 journey has been SO MUCH better. We are so grateful.
Since I use this column as a “family update,” here are a few other notes.
Jacob has been surfing the last few days with his buddy, experiencing some independency, driving back and forth to La Jolla on his own.
Josie, also driving lots now, wants a job, as does Jake. Both are out of summer school.
My body is finally adjusting to the rigors of Skyline’s Boot Camp. The first month was SO tough. My body was screaming back at me. Yesterday was the first day (beginning of month two) that I could come home and do normal things. Today was the first day that I was not consumed with dread in going to Boot Camp. So I am making progress.
My brother and his family are profoundly deep in grief over the loss of their 21 year old son. I wish I could report it has gotten easier. It has not. At least, as of yet. We pray for them, and talk to them almost daily.
My “sabbatical” is continuing, as I get things organized that have not been properly in place for the last few years. Lots of sorting! So badly needed. Not exciting, I admit. But, does it feel good to get it done!
And my family is shocked. They are seeing me sit and relax. Apparently – according to their comments – that is something they have not seen. Sunday night at my mother’s, all of us, just sitting and talking. Last night late, around the pool, with Janie’s family and Josh’s family. Fun. Great times. Thankful for family.
I am continuing to do radio interviews on my book Heaven and the Afterlife. On national shows, I am getting some interesting questions from callers. Neat ministry.
Bottom line: we are doing good & praising God. Thank you so much for agreeing with us for Carol’s long term miracle!
Thursday, July 30, 2009, 9 pm
posted on 07/30/2009 No comments
Carol made it through round #5 of chemo today. She was not dreading going today because the Infusion Center chairs face an all glass wall. Thirty feet beyond that wall and up four floors is a glassed-in hallway where the preemie babies are kept, specifically our new grandson that was born July 19. In other words, if Tyson was simply taken out in the hallway, Grandma could see her new grandson, right from her infusion chair.
Carol had a reaction to the chemo that we discovered is normal for persons that have had Carboplatin 10 times. This chemo treatment was her 11th time: Six in 2007 and now five in 2009.
They were in hopes of keeping her from experiencing the uncomfortable itchiness (strangely enough, especially the palms of her hands). To prevent the reaction they gave her Benadryl intravenously. That however made her VERY drowsy.
Due to the reaction, they took longer giving the Gemsar, which followed the Carboplatin. Thus we left later than originally scheduled.
When they finally released her, guess who was being released at that exact moment in the building 30 ft away? You guessed it. Our new 5 lb grandson Tyson.
Thus proud Grandma (and Grandpa too) left the hospital with Tyson & Mommy Lacy & Daddy Joshua. A great moment.
Important observation: There is no Garlow in the hospital in San Diego at the moment! Yes! We plan to keep it that way!
I am on sabbatical, trying to get life organized, although there have been some significant “interruptions” of sort. In the midst of this, I am doing radio interviews almost daily regarding my newly released book Heaven and the Afterlife. But overall, I am trying to “slow down” for a while.
Part of my slowing down, however, does not include some physical reality. I have regretfully gotten out of shape. So I signed up for Skyline Church’s rigorous Boot Camp which meets 6 – 7 pm every Monday through Thursday.
Wow, is it hard! Good, but hard. Awesome, but hard. We finished the one month mark tonight. Last night we did the timed mile run. I have improved a lot, but I was way out of shape…and have a long way to go. My muscles have been screaming at me every day for a month.
Most of the people in the class are ½ my age. Why are there not others my age in Boot Camp? Because they are smart! : )
Two nights ago we were going to drive to the hospital to see Tyson. I said, “Carol, I cannot drive. My muscles are way too sore!” She drove. How sad is that. Carol is doing better on chemo than I am with Boot Camp. What a wimp I am!?!? Yes? No?
Okay (you who are reading this), come join me! Monday, August 3, 6 pm – Skyline’s Athletic Field. See you! (Now who is smiling?) : )
Seriously, thank you so much for continuing to pray for the miracle that we need over the next four years for Carol. Blessings on you.
Monday, July 27, 2009, 6 pm
posted on 07/28/2009 No comments
Greetings!
Carol is doing great. She is having an MRI right now. We are expecting good results. She needs to rest a great deal. But other than that, she is really doing well. Next chemo: July 30.
We really enjoyed hearing Chicago in concert – at Humphries by the bay – Sunday night. Rather than purchase pricey seats, we watched / listened from the comfort of Bruce Smith’s boat. All the boats jammed into the bay to hear the concert – all next to each other – all tied to each other. Sandwiches & snacks on board. Perfect weather. Chicago did all the 1970’s hits, except my favorite, “I’ve Been Searchin’ So Long.” Closed with the classic “25 or 6 to 4.” Awesome evening.
Baby Tyson Jacob Garlow is still in the hospital. He is doing great, but may be in there for awhile. Lacy (mommy) is doing awesome. We are very excited to see him come home.
As one more way of both honoring and saying goodbye to my 21 year old nephew, Christopher Garlow, I have accumulated many links regarding his life. For those of you that have the time, the ones that might be most interesting is No. 7 and No. 8 below. No. 6 is a video broken up into many parts.
Links on Christopher Garlow’s Life and Funeral:
“No person is dead, so long as you keep saying their name and keep telling their stories.”
1. TV News story: http://www.ksn.com/mediacenter/local.aspx?videoid=793@ksnw.web.entriq.net&navCatId=17
2. Salina (KS) Journal top headline news story: http://www.saljournal.com/rdnews/story/garlow-7-17-09
3. Christopher Garlow singing “Lean on Me” at Kansas Boys State-Summer 2007, played at funeral: http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=117308097400&h=bSI1d&u=JDl8p&ref=mf
4. Slide show of Christopher Garlow’s life, played at funeral (a choice of two sites): http://fccsalina.com/Ministries/GriefShare/InMemory.aspx
or http://www.metacafe.com/watch/3084454/chris_garlows_story/
(NOTE: Metacafe commercials may appear first. We have no control over those.)
5. Christopher Garlow obituary: http://www.saljournal.com/obituaries/story/garlow072009
6. Funeral service – 1st Covenant Church, Salina, KS – video.
NOTE: The video host required the service to be divided into 16 segments, 10 minutes each. The first 5 ½ segments are prelude music, thus you might want to skip them. The service begins at the 6 minute mark in segment 5. When you click on this one, it takes you directly to section 6, about three minutes into the service. On the right hand side, you will see the other segments listed: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3mFC0lp-sTU&feature=related
7. Funeral service – 1st Covenant Church, Salina, KS, still photos, approximately 200 photos: http://gallery.me.com/joshgarlow#100237
8. Photos of burial at Walnut Grove Cemetery, near Ames, KS, approximately 150 photos, 1/8 mile from the farm of the late Burtis Garlow, grandfather of Christopher, by whom Chris is buried.
NOTE: Type in WalnutGrove as password. The password is case sensitive, so note capital letters. And note that there is no space between words: http://www.heidirescophoto.com/pickpic/gallery/splash.php?gallery_id=58
Wednesday, July 22, 2009, 11 pm
posted on 07/23/2009 No comments
So very much has happened recently. Much of it I have covered in sketchy entries on Facebook. Some of it has not been covered. The following is written, probably more for my own therapy than for the need of anyone to read it.
– —
Our life was profoundly affected by two opposite events – a death and a birth. Death of a 21 year old nephew. Birth of a grandson.
The key issue: Carol was able to handle extremely well the packing and flights to Kansas for the funeral.
I flew out to Kansas last Thursday, July 16. My mother, sister and brother-in-law came Friday. Carol, Jake and Josie came on Saturday. Josh, Janie, Jeremy and sons – Riley & Aidan – came on Sunday night. The funeral was Monday. We all flew home late Tuesday night, in fact, past midnight.
Since the new grandson was born while we were away – 6 am Sunday morning – we did not get to see him till today, Wednesday, July 22. Carol was elated to hold him today – for the first time – her 5th grandson! No granddaughters!
Tyson Jacob Garlow was born 7 ½ weeks early, at 5 lbs, 5 oz, 18 inches. Lacy, our daughter-in-law, was released from the hospital on Tuesday, July 21, after being there 15 days. Tyson will likely be kept in the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit, usually shortened NICU (sometimes pronounced “Nickyou”) for a least another week, we think.
I, as grandpa, held him today. He is tiny. But he is a handsome dude! Lots of black hair. Unlike other babies – who generally don’t look all that great – he is impressive looking. (Bias talking!)
I prayed over him as I held him. I wondered what life would be like for him. I thought about how all of us understood and viewed our “grandpas” and was shocked that I am one – again – for the 5th time!
Bottom line: we are elated with Josh & Lacy’s newest addition. Big brothers Lukas and Jackson are thrilled.
And Carol is doing VERY well. She has an MRI this Monday. Her next chemo is on July 30 followed by the 6th and final one on Aug 20.
Now I shift topics – to one that is quite somber, the death of our nephew.
The following paragraphs were sent to our entire Skyline Church family. WARNING: It contains a lot of “personal stuff,” so feel free to skip over sections as you desire. It is, I admit, much more detail than you want, so do not feel pressured to read any more than the first couple paragraphs.
The first few paragraphs contain the basic facts. After that, I philosophize about life. Death produces those types of thoughts.
– —
THE DEATH OF CHRISTOPHER GARLOW, AGE 21
One week ago, on Thursday, July 16 at 8 am, we received news that my 21 year old nephew, Christopher Garlow, had died in a fire in his car, a 2002 BMW. This jolted us strongly, as our family is extremely close to my brother Bill’s family.
My brother is a MD (radiology) in the town of Salina, KS, a community of approximately 50,000 in the north central portion of Kansas. Due to the fact that five of his six children are profound athletes (one is Down’s Syndrome), and thus have high visibility, it was the lead TV news story that night: http://www.ksn.com/mediacenter/local.aspx?videoid=793@ksnw.web.entriq.net&navCatId=17
In fact, in the Salina Journal newspaper, it was the top headline story on the front page, above the story of Walter Cronkite’s passing: http://www.saljournal.com/rdnews/story/garlow-7-17-09
Pray for Bill & Laurie and their five surviving children. This is brutally hard on them. They are not strangers to death. Laurie, while growing up, saw her family reduced from five children to three when Wally died of a motorcycle accident at 15, and Ryan was killed in a terrible farm accident when he was six (I officiated that funeral in North Dakota, one of the most painful I have ever conducted).
Bill, likewise, grew up in a home that was reduced from five children to three, as Janie never reached her first birthday, and Bob, his twin, died in a plane crash at age 19.
OBITUARY
Here is the obituary of Christopher Garlow: http://www.saljournal.com/obituaries/story/garlow072009, which was read at the funeral service by my daughter Janie and her husband, Jeremy McGarity.
Christopher is the fourth in order of the six children. He is named after the Christopher Garlow of the late 1700’s, the first Garlow to come to America.
THE FUNERAL
Nearly 1,000 persons attended the funeral, the largest – we were told – in that city. Many of the attenders were high school age, college/university age. Almost all of the Pi Kappa Alpha fraternity of Kansas State University in Manhattan, KS – where Chris was a senior, and also the city in which he died – attended, along with many students from Colorado Christian University (Denver) where Chris attended his freshman year. In addition, many came from “Boy’s State,” an elite student leadership movement in which Chris had participated many years. And several hundreds came from Chris’s soccer, football, tennis and golf teams, along with other athletes.
The music was performed by Josh Garlow (who left San Diego to catch a flight only a few hours after the 6 am Sunday morning birth of his third son, Tyson Jacob Garlow) – assisted by Skyline’s drummer (Donnie) and bass player (Luis). In addition to the worship music, Josh led in one of Christopher’s favorite Jeremy Camp songs.
Due to the fact that Christopher’s sister, Megan, had read my book Heaven and the Afterlife, Chris and his brothers and sisters spent Sunday night, July 5, around a campfire at a lake talking about the book, about heaven, about death and dying, and what they wanted at their funerals. One of Chris’s primary requests that night was for an African American Choir to sing at his funeral, which all presumed would not happen for many decades. Little did he know that the event was only 11 days away. Honoring Chris’s request, the St. John’s Missionary Baptist Gospel Choir presented a powerful musical rendition concerning heaven’s “robes and crowns.”
I had the privilege of preaching at the funeral. As you might surmise, I preached about heaven, and what is meant by the harps, robes and crowns. I talked about what we will do in heaven, and where it is located. I was profoundly amazed at how much hunger there is to know about heaven – even among university and high school students. The leader of Chris’s fraternity sought me out at the burial, telling me, “That is all we have been able to talk about, since the funeral service (3 hours earlier). We have never heard this. It was so good for us to hear this.”
Here is the slide show of Christopher Garlow’s life that was shown at the funeral: http://www.metacafe.com/watch/3084454/chris_garlows_story/
Chris enjoyed music and forensics as well. You can view Christopher singing “Lean on Me” at Kansas Boys State in the summer of 2007. This video was played at funeral: http://www.facebook.com/ext/share.php?sid=117308097400&h=bSI1d&u=JDl8p&ref=mf
(NOTE: As noted in the beginning of this email, this email is mainly “human interest stories,” highly personal “stuff.” Do not feel obligated to read further. You have been warned – smile.)
Assisting me in the funeral was Doug McHenry, pastor of First Covenant Church, where my brother and family worship. Doug – much younger than me – and I grew up in the same very small country Kansas church, which never had an attendance of more than 75 people. As my mother’s maiden name is McHenry, Doug is my 3rd cousin. In fact, Christopher is buried only 10 feet from where Doug’s grandparents are buried.
WALUNUT GROVE CEMETERY
Christopher was laid to rest next to my father (Burtis Garlow), my sister (Janie Garlow) and my brother (Bob Garlow, Bill’s twin); only a few feet from where my grandparents (Joshua and Ruby Garlow) are buried. In fact, there are four generations of Garlows buried there and six generations of McHenrys (remember, that is my mother’s maiden name). (I bought my cemetery plot – next to my grandparents – when I was in high school.)
Walnut Grove Cemetery is sacred soil to us for more than the fact that this is where our family members and ancestors rest in peace. It is where we grew up. Our lives were spent within a couple miles of that holy ground.
THE FARM, THE SCHOOL & THE CHURCH
The northern fence of the cemetery is a common one with the pasture, formerly owned by my father (now owned by my cousin Don Garlow), where I used to raise and feed and herd cattle. For those of you so inclined, they were white face Hereford steers – http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/262975/Hereford. The cemetery is on a bluff, overlooking the Republican River Valley, with its rich farm land.
The first thing one sees as you look down in the valley is our farmstead – the house, barns, machine sheds, grain bins and silo – where we were raised, approximately 300 yards from the cemetery – slightly beyond the old farm pond where I first learned to ice skate as a five year old, pushing a chair in front of me for support. Then your eyes can see for miles to the north across dark rich green corn and soybean fields, farms that I worked the first two decades of my life, and have returned to hundreds of times since.
Across the dirt road from the cemetery is “Magaw’s Meadow” where we went sledding in the winter time, down the steep embankment, zipping at high speeds between the trees down in the base of the hill. At times, the snow was so deep and drifted so deep that we could walk across the top of a four strand barbed wire fence on the snow! Only 200 yards to the south, slightly up the hill from Walnut Grove, is the site of the former one room country Hillcrest School – since torn down – where I attended grades one through eight. When all eight grades were added together, we sometimes had as many as 18 students – which we thought was a large school. When I started first grade there, I WAS the first grade. It was just me!
One mile south is the site of Morgan Chapel (Wesleyan Methodist, as it was then called) Church, now also torn down and gone. This spiritually vivacious church produced 40 pastors. I am number 36. Doug McHenry is number 40. The church lasted 99 years and 9 months.
No one knew that it was so close to a centennial or surely they would have kept it open for 3 more months so it could reach the 100 year mark. On its final Sunday, there were only three in attendance – Maude Moberly, Alice Moberly – two never married sisters – and Clarence Lingo, a widower.
Ironically, on that particular Sunday, I was preaching to 2,000 persons at Bethany First Church of the Nazarene some six hours drive to the south, in Oklahoma City, where I was a young associate pastor. Had I known that Morgan Chapel was closing that day, I would have gladly foregone preaching to 2,000 for the privilege of preaching to three persons at my beloved Morgan Chapel. Many of you know, I have a pew and the original pulpit – from where I first heard the Gospel – in my house.
COMMUNITY LIFE
Go a mile or two further south and you come to Goernandt’s pond where – after someone would give the “community ring” on the “16 member party phone line” saying “the ice is thick enough at Gorenandt’s pond” – everyone would gather to go ice skating at night, with a big bonfire in the middle of the ice. Another couple miles puts us at the “Twin Mounds” – very small hills on the Kansas prairie (though we thought they were huge!) – where we would gather to sled on a ¼ mile run, with as many as six of us on a single piece of sheet metal roofing that we (foolishly) used as a massive sled!
(Now you see why I warned you this was personal. No pressure to read further! However, if you continue, you will see why I have written this.)
APPLICATION TO YOUR LIFE
My reason for telling you this is not to drag you unwillingly down my personal memory lane. What draws me back is not ultimately sites where buildings once stood, or to cornfields I once tilled, or to a house in which I once lived.
What draws me “back” is values. Values that come from a deep Christ-centered commitment. I have no interest in “taking you back” to a place you have never been.
But I have great interest in taking you back to values. Biblical values. Authentic family values.
Our lives have become far too complicated. Too complex. Too eroded by current values. Tarnished and “mud splattered” with junk! Stuff we should never have to see or hear.
Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton and Michael Jackson and the likes have received too much attention. Even the oldies – Elizabeth Taylor and Larry King, both married eight times each – get way too much of our focus. Not even Barak Obama or Mark Sandford are front and center in our understanding of heroes.
The real heroes are not merely tucked in my past. As you know, they are resident within yours as well. If you have such values in your past – and many (most?) of you do – look back to these people. Look back to these people who will never be written up in People Magazine or Us. Look back to the people who lived out honest, integrous, sincere, sacrificial lives.
They drive pickup trucks, go to work on time, pay bills, swap stories on the bleachers during small town Friday night football games, remain faithful to their spouses, know that viewing porn or smoking pot is wrong, understand that marriage is one man and one woman, and will never capture the interest of TMZ.com reporters. They sing old hymns as well as new praise songs and believe the words of both. They salute the flag, and don’t understand why the ACLU is so worried when their kids want to pray at school.
They are the people of my past. Yours too. That is why the Walnut Grove Cemetery seemed so peaceful from 8:30 pm to 9:30 pm (it gets dark later there in July) that night, Friday, July 17, when we were picking out where Christopher would be buried the following Monday. I stood there with family, with relatives, and with a guy that mowed the cemetery grass that I had not seen since we were in high school together.
The only sound we could hear was the sound of the bobwhites, the meadow larks, the joyous screams of children playing on the old “tire swing” in the front yard of the farm house, where I grew up approximately 1/8 of a mile away, and the occasional roar of an old pick up truck going by with a faulty muffler.
And there are sights and sounds like that in your mind. From your past. Perhaps not a farm. Maybe it was the city. But you have memories of persons with values that were better than the commonly expressed values of Sacramento or Washington or Berkley or The New York Times.
Maybe you cannot get “back” there. But – thank God for the gifts of memory and imagination – you can get there “in your mind.” Better yet, since values – biblical values – are involved, you can get there in your heart.
Life is short, whether you live to be only 21, like Christopher, or 91, like my friend Ponder who died last week. Life is short. So give it away to that which counts.
And that is what this story is ultimately about. Ultimately it is not about my past. It is how you are going to live your future.
Your friend and brother in this experiment called “life,”
Jim Garlow
July 14, 2009
posted on 07/14/2009 No comments
Tuesday, July 14, 2009, 10 pm
Carol continues to do…well…fairly good. Beginning Saturday evening (remember her 4th round of chemo was Thursday) she started feeling weak and nauseous.
The good news is that we were, however, able to hang out on the beach and our beach condo, Friday from 3 pm till 11 pm. That was so good. (The condo is rented out all the time. That one night happened to be open, so we jumped on it.)
From Saturday on, she has been weak and occasionally slightly nauseous. It tends to come and go. Sometimes she seems almost normal. An hour later, she is not feeling good.
But overall, she has been doing SO MUCH BETTER than the first “chemo season” back in 2007. Thus we really praise God.
– –
Now an update on Lacy (our daughter-in-law): She has been in the hospital over a week. They got good news today that the baby is 33.5 weeks along, two weeks more than thought. Secondly, the weight of the baby is believed to be 5 lbs at this time. They are still trying to hold contractions to a minimum, but they still occur almost every evening – sometimes continuing through the night.
Josh was to have been in Maryland all week leading worship, playing keyboard & guitar at a camp there. Needless to say, he had to ask to be released. He sent them a video saying that the reason he could not come was because the King of Pop had died, and in his grief, could not even go out of the house!?!??!?!
– –
Josh and I are in Skyline Church’s Boot Camp. Josh is slender, athletic, young, and (because he joined the Boot Camp months ago) very muscular.
I am in my 2nd week (or should I say “weak”) of Boot Camp. In contrast to Josh, I am _____ and _______ and _______ and _______ (admit it, you have been filling in the blanks!) and SO BLASTED SORE!
– –
Jake is doing better in the anemia. In fact MUCH better. He went with me to Boot Camp last night. As a result of how much he was able to do (he “smoked” me – like an F-18 compared to a locomotive!), he returned to wrestling practice tonight. That is an important health step for him.
– –
I am on a “sabbatical” for a few weeks. But this is not a “sit around” sabbatical, or a “read a book beside a lake” sabbatical. Those are great. But that is not what this one is – yet!
This is a “Finish It Sabbatical.” What do I mean by that? I have heard it said, “One of the keys to inner peace is to finish all the things you have started but have never finished.” So I am experiencing a “Finish It Sabbatical.”
Last week, I allowed 4 days to clean my study at home. Done! This week, I allowed 4 days to go through 18 file drawers – with 100’s (1,000’s?) of files. I removed ALL the files from all file cabinets, threw many away, then re-arranged the rest in proper order, by placing them in piles all over the floor & and down a hallway, and finally placed them in their proper file drawer which was then slide back into the proper file cabinet.
Sounds boring? Well, this is not a circus or the zoo or the beach. But it sure is going to feel good to get things in proper order and hopefully to get rid of lots and lots of things. Simplify, remember?
(There are 16 files drawers at church that I have to go through, but those can wait.)
The summer of 2007 was taken by cancer. The summer of 2008 was taken by Prop 8. And even before that, I have lived life “too hard & too fast!” In the process, things got out of order as we (too often) lived in “survival mode.” This summer we are still dealing with cancer, but not in a way that precludes us from somewhat normal living.
– –
Tomorrow, my book HEAVEN AND THE AFTERLIFE hits the nation’s bookstores. My co-author and I just learned that the pre-sales have made it the #1 seller for our publisher, Bethany House/The Baker Group. In spite of the fact that I am on a sabbatical, I knew I would have to do interviews. I was aware that the timing of this book’s “arrival” would land in the early days of the sabbatical. But there was no way to avoid it. So tomorrow the interviews begin.
Fortunately they are radio interviews, so I can do them from my home. I turned down a TV interview for this morning. For starters the interview pertained to giving comments on the hearings of Judge Sonia Sotomayor, not on my book. Thus I had little interest – at least during a sabbatical. But the TV interviews cost so much time in travel to/from studios. I will be doing multiple radio interviews a days from home.
I don’t mind the interviews that are short (15-30 minutes). I don’t care for the long ones (1 hour) unless they are nationwide. I have one or maybe two of those tomorrow. The one type of interview I do NOT like is when they open the phone lines for callers to ask questions.
The reason? For some reason, it seems as if the types of persons who call in are the (how do I say this nicely) “strange ones!” And I think it will be worse on a book on the afterlife. Remember that in my book is a chapter on some wild topics: demons, ghosts, angels, heaven, hell, the judgment, reincarnation, purgatory, annihilationism, universalism and NDE’s, that is “Near Death Experiences”, people who “crossed over” and came back with images of the afterlife. So, you can imagine what kind of callers I may get.
– –
Well – too much information! We are enjoying life! Praising God for each day! Thank you SO MUCH for praying for Carol…and for Lacy & baby!
Friday, July 10, 2009
posted on 07/10/2009 No comments
I am up late. Busy day. Busy week.
Due to the fact that the “poking” for veins was taking its toll, and the chemo was causing very large red splotched painful swelling in her arm, Carol had a “port” installed under the skin on her upper arm. This procedure was more consuming than we anticipated. We spent nearly eight hours in the hospital this past Monday for that procedure.
Then Carol had – with the use of the port – round 4 of six rounds of chemo on Thursday (July 9) – consuming much of the day. We were ready to leave the infusion center of Sharp Outpatient, when she began to have a reaction.
We have discovered that on the 10th time a person has carboplatin (part of Carol’s chemo recipe), it can cause an allergic reaction – a profound itching over the entire body. Ironically, it is often strongest in the palms of the hands.
Thus they kept Carol longer, as they called the doctor. To offset this, they gave her a strong medication to cause her to sleep through it. Predictably she became very groggy / sleepy the remainder of the day. She slept the afternoon and evening. (That accounts for why we are wide awake at 1:30 am – now!)
- – -
Two years ago, in Aug 2007, Carol experienced one of her worst days. Amazingly, my mother had surgery the same day, and they put her on the same floor as Carol, thus allowing me to run back and forth between the two – only a one minute walk from each other.
Well today was a bit of a repeat of that. Our daughter-in-law – Lacy Garlow – has been in the hospital for two days, now going on three. She is 9 weeks premature in delivering Josh & Lacy’s third child (a boy again), to be named Tyson.
They were told that the baby was going to come today, and that he would have to be in the hospital for weeks. But they were successful in medicating Lacy so the contractions finally stopped. Now they have informed Lacy that she is going to have to stay in the hospital until the baby is born, maybe a month or more. She was quite discouraged, as she is missing her boys at home – Lukas and Jackson.
Josh has been living at the hospital, but is now changing his focus to being primarily with the boys, at home. They are juggling and handling it well.
Lacy is in the hospital only 40+ feet from the building housing the chemo infusion center. In fact, from Carol’s position, she is looking out the entire glass wall towards the hospital. The corresponding wall of Lacy’s hospital is also primarily glass, so we almost had it arranged so Lacy and Carol would be able to see each other (but not quite). In summary, it made it easy for Josh and me to go back and forth between the two all day Thursday, with only a 3 minute walk from one to the other.
- – -
Continuing news from the “Family Health Department:” Our 18 year old son Jacob continues to be quite anemic. As you may recall he was in the hospital a couple weeks ago, caused by internal bleeding (which was caused by a medication he was taking for a wrestling knee injury). He is still quite weak, so we have a journey there as well.
Now from the “Muscle Groans Department:” Skyline Church offers an incredible “Boot Camp” to get in good shape physically. I signed up for it and went – beginning Monday. I have NEVER, NEVER, NEVER had so many SUPER sore muscles – everywhere! Thanks to the excessive soreness, I now walk like a 90 year old.
The Boot Camp is awesome. The “drill sergeant” (Jake Glazer) is fabulous. And Sean Howarter (Skyline’s sports pastor) is to be so congratulated for thinking of this. But my muscles – at this moment – do NOT like either of them. (smile)
- – -
Now from the “Motherhood, Apple Pie and the Flag Department:” Carol LOVES – I mean REALLY loves – to bake apple pies each 4th of July. Every year she goes out in the front yard and picks fruit from the apple tree, then bakes the pies.
Two years ago, she was extremely sick in the hospital. (In fact, the 4th of July time was one of her worst times.) Dennis Suchecki, from Skyline Church, came over and picked the apples. My mother and my brother-in-law baked them. We took the pies to the hospital and served them to the entire staff of the 8th floor oncology unit that year. (Carol cried hard initially that she could not do the picking and baking, but quickly got over that and began to rejoice as she saw the nurses enjoying themselves.)
Well – fast forward to this year! Carol was “up and at it” – picking the apples and baking the pies. She was in heaven! She was feeling so good on the 4th – for which we praise God. In fact, we celebrated the 4th on the 5th and the 6th as well.
And – if…if…if…if she is doing good this afternoon (Friday afternoon), we are going to the beach! The second day through the fourth day – after chemo – in the last chemo round, were NOT good days. They were rough. But we are believing she is going to feel so good that we will make it to the beach. We have not been able to go for – I am not sure how long – so very long. So we are very excited about that.
Thank you…thank you so much…for continuing to pray for her. We are superbly grateful!
Friday, June 26, 2009
posted on 06/26/2009 No comments
I have good news to report! Carol has improved! I am so, so, so grateful.
As you know from previous blogs, she became sick from the chemo Friday night (June 19). Saturday and Sunday (a week ago) were disconcerting, disappointing and discouraging. It felt a little like the horrific experience of 2007.
There were some improvements by Wednesday (June 24). But finally today at approximately 2:15 pm (but whose keeping time, right?), she stated, “Even though I don’t have my strength back, I don’t feel sick now.” That was awesome news.
Apparently the “chemo accumulation” is such that it finally took its toll this past week. The “Friday-to-Friday” sickness was, we presume, a response to not one, or two, but all three rounds of chemo.
Although her strength was very low during most of the past week, it is back, I think, to the 65% mark, for which we are very grateful.
Her strength was such that we were able to go to Doheny State Beach & Park (Dana Point) on Wednesday evening to be with 90 of our high schoolers and 20+ of our high school staff and workers. (See my all church email about how incredibly awesome the youth camp was.)
We left home at 5 pm Thursday and arrived back home at 11:30 pm that night. That was all she could handle. But I was so grateful she could handle that.
Then on Thursday, our older two children and grandchildren “migrated” to our backyard pool in what was an unplanned and spontaneous gathering. That really invigorated Carol. She was able to get in the pool with grandkids and REALLY LOVED IT.
As the sun went down, she wrapped up in a blanket and lay on a lawn chair. She was quiet as the rest of us laughed and talked. I knew she was “spent.” But, as was confirmed by later conversation, she was so fulfilled to have her family with her.
Bottom line: One week ago right now (7 pm, Friday), I was talking with her and saw the “blank look” in her eyes. I could tell something was wrong. She simply muttered, “I don’t feel good.” And what a week it was.
But praise God, she is so much improved! And for that, we thank God and we thank you for your prayers.
Wednesday, June 24
posted on 06/24/2009 No comments
Wednesday, June 24, 2009, 3 pm
This blog is less about Carol’s condition, as it is about the emotional ups & downs of the cancer battle. Perhaps this will be helpful to some caregiver out there.
Tuesdays are always long meeting days for me. My meetings went solid from 8:30 am till 6:30 pm. Since our children – Jake & Josie – are gone to youth camp, I was eager to finally get home and see how Carol was doing.
On the way home, I tried calling her. Once. Then twice. Then three times. Finally four times. I became concerned.
I walked in the house – at 6:45 pm, wondering where she was. She was laying on the large chair & ottoman in the living room, covered up, asleep. I wondered why she had not heard the phone ringing so many times, then noticed she had iPod earpieces in both ears.
I walked over to her, not wanting to frighten her as I woke her. I said, “Carol.” Then again, then again, then louder, thinking I would overpower the iPod.
Seeing that my voice was not waking her, I touched her forearm. Touching it did not awaken her. I rubbed it more, and then noticed it was cold, or at least not as warm as I expected. Then I felt a moment of fear.
In the two seconds that followed, might heart pounded. I went through a moment of panic! What was wrong?
Finally, she then opened her eyes. Very groggy.
The whole incident of panic lasted only a couple seconds. But it impacted me. For two seconds, I felt I might have lost her.
We talked for a minute. I never told her that my heart was still racing – from the momentary fear I felt. I took my things to my study, and came right back to her, for us to get some dinner in the kitchen. But she was sound asleep. Again. I stood there for a moment. Then I realized that I should not awaken her. Obviously she needed the rest.
Disappointment consumed me. I had expected to be with Carol. I had come home expecting to enjoy being “empty nesters” for four days while the kids were at camp. (You see, we have been raising babies since 1977! In case you do not know, that is a long time – smile)
Realizing she was not doing well, I did not waken her a second time. I let her sleep. I went to the frig and pulled out something to eat. I sat at the table to eat, and had – I am ashamed to admit – a “pity party.” I was bummed she was sick. I was bummed that – instead of enjoying four evenings of “empty nesting” – I was alone.
And to be honest, I was still impacted by her not awakening as quickly as I had anticipated. That moment had put some fear in me. Cancer does that. It messes with your head.
I sat there feeling sorry for myself, eating alone.
Then, after about five minutes, it hit me. This is so self-absorbed. My thoughts are so blasted selfish. This is so “it’s all about me.” I became quite ashamed of myself.
I should have been thinking “how must Carol be feeling?” She had been home all day. I should have been focusing on “what is she experiencing.”
Moving beyond my “personal pity party,” I heard a noise. I looked to my right. It was Carol, getting up. Still a bit groggy. But up.
I was very thankful for that. And we enjoyed a great evening together.
Care-givers can, if not careful, become too self-focused. I have been fortunate through 2007 and most of the last 100 days to not experience that. Yet there had been moments when I was consumed with how badly I felt about “things” – about this thing called “cancer” and what it had done to my life. Last evening, around 7 pm was one of those self-centered moments, I am ashamed to say. It showed me how vulnerable I am to the old “it’s all about me” syndrome.
As we moved from Tuesday into Wednesday, it does not appear that Carol’s energy has improved lots, but it has definitely improved some. And I am so grateful.
As I write this, she thinks she is feeling good enough for us to make a drive to the state park and beach where our church youth – including our own two children – are camping out this week.
So it appears (as of the moment of this writing) that she is feeling somewhat better. It seems to change quickly. Chemo does that. But at this moment, she is doing reasonably well, say 40%+ strength level.
And for that I am so thankful!
Monday, June 22, 2009
posted on 06/22/2009 No comments
In the last few blogs, I reported that Carol was handling the chemo so well. And she was. Definitive word: “was.”
I wrote at 5 pm on Friday that Carol was doing so well. Two hours later, I could tell she was not. Friday evening her strength began to plummet.
Saturday she lay on the living sofa, groaning, nauseous – like the “old times” of 2007.
Sunday she was in bed all day, still feeling sick. Missed church for the first time. (In 2007, she missed church for five months, I believe.)
Monday she was somewhat improved, so much so that she was able to go to the church to say goodbye to Jake and Josie as they left for youth camp for the week. But by Monday afternoon, she was back in bed. A few moments ago, she said, “I don’t feel good.”
I need to contextualize this a bit: From June to November 2007, her strength level was often – as I have said – as low as the 2% mark. She could do almost nothing. And she was in great discomfort. She lay quiet, motionless, sometimes moaning. It was hard.
During the previous two rounds of chemo (the past seven weeks), Carol has handled the chemo so well. In my usual “percentage-style thinking,” I have said she is at the 65% level, strength-wise.
Well, that definitely changed Friday night, June 19. It fell to 25%, or so it seemed to me, a dramatic drop. Today for awhile (noon time, when Jake & Josie were leaving for camp), I thought we were increasing to the 40% mark. But it appears that might have been temporary.
My concern is plain. Chemo, we know, is cumulative in its impact. It “builds.” I am very concerned that her body has reached a point where it might not be able to respond at that 65% level we have enjoyed so much. If that is the case, we could be in this mode till October.
I was SO looking forward to a summer with her being well. Summer 2007 was taken by great sickness. Summer 2008 was taken by the Prop 8 battle. Summer 2009 was to be THE summer. Then came cancer again – in March. But – to my great delight – she was handling the chemo so very well, that I thought, “we might actually have a somewhat ‘normal’ summer.”
As you know, I feel the liberty to use this blog for some catharsis. And perhaps that is what I am doing. I admit it.
And when I consider so many who have lost their mates in the battle of cancer, I should be rejoicing that I am not in that situation.
So we praise God for what we do have, even if it is only 25% strength and does not feel very “normal.” We shall see what is ahead. I am praying the new low of “25%” is not the new “normal.”
We really appreciate your prayers – so very much. I put out a message on Facebook last evening. I did not even think about people responding, as I know how busy we all are. But within minutes, commitments to pray for her came pouring in. It was so very gratifying to see – or rather feel – this.
So, once again, thank you for your ongoing prayers.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
posted on 06/19/2009 No comments
Okay, I have not updated the blog for a month! I have heard from many of you, saying “what is wrong?” Some of you have been worried that something is wrong. Nothing is wrong, except I am overcommitted & overextended.
Summary: Carol is doing well, except for reaction to chemo. Her left arm is in pain, swelled, with red splotches all over. It is an inexplicable reaction to the chemo. She was in Urgent Care last night. She was in pain last night and tonight. So, we’ll have to check it out.
Her strength level is about 65%, which is encouraging. Overall, she is handling the chemo well. Remember in 2007, her strength level was about 2%. She lay in a darkened room, moaning, in horrible pain, and vomiting for over seven weeks nonstop, with repeated trips to the hospital. So we are ecstatic that her strength level is 65%!
Since this blog tends to cover overall “family news,” I’ll include a few more things.
Last week, our 18 year old son Jake was in the hospital for 3 days & two nights. He had a wrestling injury several months ago. He was on Naproxen for an injured knee. The meds plus ibuprofen products created a bleeding ulcer. The ulcerations caused a substantial loss of blood. We did not recognize the symptoms quickly enough. His stomach will be healing over the next eight weeks.
I am so thankful that Carol was strong enough to stay with him during the hospital visit. I was there much of the time, but she really “stayed the course.”
In addition, they put Jake in one of the few beds available, which turned out to be first floor in the new hospital. Unknown to us, that was the oncology floor (8th floor in the old hospital where Carol had been). Therefore, Carol knew all the nurses as they had cared for her so many times in the last half of 2007. As a result, they were so sensitive to Carol each time they came in to take care of Jacob.
Carol, Jake, Josie and I were able to make a trip to Washington, DC, May 19-21 where I received the “Watchman on the Wall” award from the Family Research Council, and the family toured all the standard sights. We had a superb time.
Last week, I made a quick trip to Norfolk, VA, where I spoke briefly at a major pastors conference, then at a nearby youth pastors conference, and then did two interviews with CBN, 700 Club.
My new book, HEAVEN AND THE AFTERLIFE came out today! I was so surprised as I did not expect it until the announced release date of July 1. The presale numbers are so encouraging that the publisher is in dialogue with us regarding a sequel.
On May 26, the Supreme Court of California announced that it would uphold Prop 8, the marriage amendment here. This was encouraging. As a result I did 30 interviews in three days, including Larry King Live and another (taped) stint on Dr. Phil. It was an intense time.
Thank you to so many who help support my one minute radio commentary called THE GARLOW PERSPECTIVE, which is now on 685 radio outlets each day. We have had a couple of major fundraisers recently. A huge thank you to those who have helped with that!
We are so encouraged that we are FINALLY getting ready to build a badly needed auditorium here at Skyline Church. We are in the architectural phase, fund raising phase and permitting phase. It is look so very encouraging. I am really pumped about this!
Back to Carol, the real purpose of this blog. Here is the positive and the negative:
Positively, she is dong well on a daily basis, in terms of handling the chemo. She looks so good. You would hardly know she is a chemo patient. But therein lies a problem, which I will mention in two paragraphs.
Negatively, she needs a miracle to “break through” the five year mark. She has had two of six rounds of chemo this time. She will complete chemo by Oct 1. Then she needs to get into remission AND STAY THERE. We must have that breakthrough. We need a miracle. And we are candidates for it!
Negatively, I sometimes feel that we are not caring for her as we (Jake, Josie and I) should. The reason? We are thrown a bit “off guard.” When she was so very sick in June-Dec of 2007, I cancelled everything and ministered to her. It was easy to do because she could not do anything, and desperately needed 24 hour care.
But now she looks well. In fact she looks great. People say all the time to her (much to her embarrassment), “you look beautiful!” And she does. Consequently, we are not able to see what is happening at times on the “inside.”
For example, there are times (always unanticipated) when she suddenly needs us. There are unpredictable times – out of the blue – when she has pain. It is rare. It is not often. But it occurs at times – totally without warning.
The fact that she gets around so well and looks so good is a two-edged sword. Since she seems to be so well and get around, we are not as focused on her as she sometimes needs. We are not adept at anticipating when the chemo takes a toll (maybe once every three or four days) and she says “I don’t feel good!”
Thus I am moving into a “shut down” time during July and August. In fact, I am trying to significantly slow things down during the remainder of June. But I am determined to really focus at home during July and August. I have a wonderful and skilled group of pastors and support staff at church. They are exceptional! I have 100% confidence in them.
Carol (along with Jake & Josie) will appreciate it. We will do simple things like clean closets and garage and files. But we will also sit by the pool and doze off in a lounge chairs.
I, above all, will be able to truly focus on her. She deserves it!
Friday, June 19, 2009
posted on 06/19/2009 No comments
Carol had chemo round 3 out of 6 yesterday, thus we are halfway through this “chemo season.” She is handling it so well! Her CA-125 markers were 5.5 (last report – on May 26) which is great! In fact, that is the lowest ever. Anything under 30 is considered good for most people. But for some reason, Carol’s numbers are a bit more “sensitive.” Her slight increase to “11” ninety days ago (which should have been of little concern for most people) indicated cancerous activity, which required the March surgery. Thus her CA-125 needs to stay between 5 and 7 or 8.
Her arm and veins have reacted to the constant “poking” and the chemo. The result has been rashes, splotches, swelling and pain. After much discussion, we have decided to have a “port” installed, under the skin of her arm, through which chemo will be given and blood work drawn. The choice was either a “port” or installing a PICC line, something that had caused enormous pain for Carol in 2007.
However, it is still so very encouraging to see Carol continue to operate at 65% or so of strength. It has been wonderful!
We are so grateful for your love and prayers. We would be “lost” without the love and prayers of believers. Thank you so very much!
Part 2 of round 1 of chemo
posted on 05/08/2009 No comments
Friday, May 8, 2009, 5 pm
I am thrilled to report that Carol is handling part 2 of round 1 of chemo phenomenally well! She had chemo on Thursday (Gemsitibine only). She does require more sleep, sometimes wearing out a bit faster. But other than that, her body is tolerating this treatment in an exceptional manner.
Round one is done. Only five more to go!
Thank you SO MUCH for your prayers. We are profoundly grateful.
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